Ritz Bites

Coolhaus competition: where ice cream AND architecture geeks unite!

Since spotting the super cute Coolhaus ice cream sandwich truck tooling along Hyperion yesterday, I'm gripped with the compulsion to keep coming up with punny names for its naming competition co-sponsored by the Dwell on Design conference. (Read details about the Sweetest Contest Ever here on Dwell's website if you want to participate, and check out Alissa's video.) I'm usually terrible at this sort of thing -- especially compared to the pun masters Aram and my brother-in-law Jake -- but for patently obvious reasons, I can't resist giving it a shot.

Below are my corny ideas ... so far. But I really must stop already. And granted, not all of the inspirations are strictly modern architects/designers. (Links to the referenced architects attached.)

I.M. Peach (ginger cookies, peach Madeira sorbet)
Tadao Toasted Almond (lavender cookies, toasted almond ice cream)
Edward Durell Stone Fruit (sea salt cookies, apricot sorbet with crushed lollipops)
Norman Bananas Foster (caramel cookies, banana brown butter ice cream)
Herzog de Melon (clove-spiced cookies, cantaloupe sorbet)
Aldo Red Raspberry (basil cookies, red raspberry sorbet)
Jean Nougat (hazelnut cookies, nougat ice cream)
Eerie Spearmint-en (zucchini cookies, spearmint ice cream)
Gorge-on Cinnamon Bunshaft (cinnamon bun cookies, maple ice cream)
Josef & Anni Albariño (lemongrass-infused cookies, Albariño wine sorbet)
Mocha Chip-idus (mocha cookies, chocolate chocolate chip ice cream)
Yens Rice-Yum (green tea-infused cookies, sake ice cream)
Henry's Bacon (biscuits with bacon, vanilla-bacon ice cream)
Birchtram Goodhues (rainbow swirl cookies with birch beer ice cream)

Exclusively California architects edition:

Stylin' O. Clementine (rhubarb cookies, clementine sorbet)
Thom Mayne Blueberry (honey cookies, Maine blueberry ice cream)
Toffee-ael Soriano (molasses cookies, toffee crunch ice cream)
George Washington Granny Smith (dried cherry cookies, granny smith ice cream)
Cloud Beerman (vanilla cookies, malt ice cream with layer of marshmallow)
Walnut Neff (walnut cookies, chevre ice cream)
Three Alarm Siren Hunt (cayenne pepper cookies, jalapeño ice cream)
Cool-ya Morgan (strawberry cookies, Captain Morgan rum raisin ice cream)
Marron Cliff-Ce (iced oatmeal cookies, marron glace ice cream)
AlFreddo RosenThyme (thyme cookies, rosewater ice cream)
WellDone Becket Biscuit (brown butter biscuit, buttermilk ice cream)

Final note: despite the length of this list, I have no delusions of any of mine becoming the winning entry. Yet I have nothing to lose but a little bit of my time. And dignity.

A Cooling Craze?

All through the Great Cupcake Craze of '05/'06, I was ready to wage a backlash.  The hype was too much.  It was also like the easy to digest and consume, literally cloying food equivalent of Lucky.  Which ashamedly I subscribe to, so I've become an unwitting victim of the trend. 

Now if I pass by Sprinkles when going to the amazing Arturo's shoe repair and there's not a line snaking out the door and down the street, I stop in for a box.  Grumble grumble.  Sometimes I'll even get cakes for a crowd, as long as it's not too prohibitively large because there are no batch discounts (bummer). 

My flavor of choice is the milk chocolate; it's rare that I prefer it, yet the frosting works better with the cake than the duller dark chocolate.  Lemon coconut is an interesting combination, too.  But I still don't think these beat a great piece of regular cake, and I'm a bigger fan of Joan's on Third's smaller, moister marshmallow-filled chocolate cupcakes.  At least Sprinkles runs are easier to do lately since the fever seems to be waning.

While I don't hate the cupcake fad as much as I did a few months ago, I'm still totally disgusted when I see people eating straight shots of frosting.  No way will I come around to loving cutesy cupcake shops that much.  I'm already on board with the much cooler, presently waxing gelato mania anyway.

An unusually Patina'd weekend

Somehow I'm usually able to avoid the ubiquity of the Patina Group. Still, sometimes you have no other choice but to grab a snack at their MoCA stand, attend a television wrap party where there is NO food, or supplement your picnic from the consession services at the Bowl. Funny how that works, eh?

It's therefore a rare weekend when two of my meals are spent at Patina Group outlets. And even more unusual to go to the the flagship of this local food vending monopoly.

We're with a nice group of folks on Friday for our friend's birthday, and it's a fun treat to check out the new-ish oft-dissed Patina in WDCH before Charles's Disney slide show at Redcat. But I make the mistake of ordering two first courses thinking it'll be enough. The agnolotti (above left) are rich and very delicious in the mushroomy sauce, and the presentation is stunning. If only the kitchen put some more in the bowl for twenty bucks. Scallops (pictured at right) are OK, but the style is cheesy early Patina (
i.e. novelty nouvelle cuisine) meets the Adria era. The contents of that spoon accompaniment are vile and taste like foamed cold chicken broth. We like the well-seared halibut with morels and asparagus (below). Hardly a risky dish, but it comes through with solid delivery.

I'm just relieved they don't point out every single fucking ingredient on the plate – even if it's the two drops of almond thyme emulsion or five miniscule fish roe – like they did when we had the tasting menu in the old Melrose space (now Providence) a few years ago.

Maybe the quick pace of this meal has clouded my judgment. Regardless, the bowl of guacamole and yes, even the Real Food Daily birthday cake are welcome sights when we stop at another birthday party on our way home.

...

I can't walk by Pentimento at LACMA without thinking of "Sentimento pentimento," a song that enjoyed great popularity in Italy during early 1995.

quando c' sentimento/non c' mai pentimento...

"When there's feeling, there's never regret," sang Neri Per Caso ("Black by Chance"), an unfortunate byproduct of the 1990s Boy Band craze.

Although matters of museum restaurants and teenage lust rarely intersect, Pentimento might want to think about this declaration if they're ever going to inject a little mojo into the kitchen. Until then you'll continue to find the same Generic Splichal Fare sold at cultural venues all over town. Offensive nor memorable describe the "vine ripened" under-ripe tomato salad served with old frise I had for lunch on Sunday. Straight down the middle, just like we supposedly like it, since the Patina Group aims to please its huge market.

So, lesson reinforced. There's not much variation to this Patina.

I Love Paris (Baguette)

I love Paris Baguette every moment of the year. (Wait for the website photos to load – it's worth it.)

Before you go, be mindful of Paris Baguette etiquette. The plexiglass drawers, carefully covered floor-mounted display shelves, and stacks of pre-unfolded and paper-lined pastry boxes comprise a self-service system that's convenient for those on the run. This method has obliterated the need to wait for harried employees to handle the delicate pastries. Instead it's all on you, buddy. You break, you buy.

Be sure to hold onto your tongs and return them to the "used tongs" container at the register, where you'll also be handed your pastry box cover. These special touches, along with the creamy cakes with all sides wrapped in protective mylar or plastic to ensure no human hand touches the edible surfaces, are every OCD victim's dream.

The other thing that wins me over is the motto. I have to admire any business that has a mission statement as sincere and ambitious at Paris Baguette's.

We serve delicious sandwich with fresh seasonal vegetable which gives you full of life.

They might want to rethink pushing that concept, however, since sandwiches aren't the main draw at this shiny happy place on Western Ave. I go for the stacks of un-French delights like red bean breads, chocolate chip cookies, and spongey green tea cakes with whipped cream frosting, and the stacked drawers loaded with traditional croissants, pain au raisin, and pain au chocolat. Yesterday I picked up what I describe as a "fishtail" with chocolate laced through the braided pastry dough.

They go a little overboard on the glazing with the vienoisserie, but otherwise the butter-laden goods have the flakiness and lightness I want at a price that makes me wonder how they're turning a profit. Just don't take this place lightly.

Paris Baguette
125 N. Western Ave. (approx. 1 block south of Beverly)
Los Angeles 90004
323.467.0404

Suggestions to Joe's in Venice

After dinner at Joe's on Abbot Kinney, this is what I've got to say to them.

DO:

• stick with serving the mellow red snapper with the thinly sliced, super crisp potato "scales" and delectable crispy spinach (pictured above). The fingerling fries served with the halibut are dope, too.

• maintain the well-lit room and comfortable chairs, and late hours to accommodate lingering customers.

• keep the cool shaggy haired waiter around who was way more helpful and nicer than the guy who initially handled our table.

DON'T:

• be a dick over the phone when I call two hours in advance to notify you that we'll be a bit late, and to ask if we can push the reservation up 15 minutes later.

• bring us the bottle of wine, wait for it to be gone, and then take our order 40 minutes after opening said bottle to the table. This wait happens even after we tell our waiter we don't need to wait for the one missing person in our party to arrive until we order.

• not inform us that when one person orders the mediocre tasting menu, it means the pace of the meal is changed for the rest of us and will delay the arrival of all other main courses.

• forget to bring us bread (the mushy, crust-less hippy kind) while the table directly next to us with the smaller party gets theirs ASAP, along with more attentive service throught the evening.

• make acidic celery root soup with no body and flat flavor that's not nearly as good as what any half-witted home cook (ahem) can whip up.

• include a side dish with halibut that sounds as tantalizing as morrel-stuffed artichoke (above), and deliver something with absolutely zero taste.

• serve a chocolate dish from the crazily verbose dessert menu featuring a yummy gooey soft cake in the middle and delicious Creamsicle-tasting orange ice cream, but drown it all in a mess of sloppy chocolate "soup."

• never deliver the bottle of water I order, and charge us for it anyway.

Joe's Restaurant
1023 Abbot Kinney Blvd.
Venice 90291
310.399.5811

S.F.G.: Golden Deli

Most folks who love Vietnamese food in Los Angeles know of, or more likely, have been to Golden Deli in San Gabriel.

I'm a victim of its greatness, meaning I don't go to Garden Grove/Westminster area because I can't imagine cha gio (fried rolls) or bun (grilled meat and sometimes fried rolls too over thin noddles, shredded lettuce and carrots) tasting any better than the stuff made in
G.D.'s kitchen. I'm sure I'm wrong, so feel free to correct my ignorance.

Here's a little pictorial reminder of the glories found within the walls of Golden Deli, from the fresh to the fried. It's also been spiffed up a lot since our last visit.

File under: So Fucking Good.

Golden Deli
815 W. Las Tunas Drive
San Gabriel, CA
626.282.6327

Best Bargain in Beverly Hills

Other than their twice-annual warehouse sales, bargains aren't Barneys thing. Besides, the idea of getting a "deal" is totally relative at those insane sales anyway.

But there is an almost shockingly cheap thing available at the fake Barney Greengrass that I discover when I take a load off and re-hydrate while H and Silvio peruse the suit racks. Overhearing the words "egg cream" at the Greengrass counter instantly points me in the right direction.

I suck it down in a minute before the waiter tells me I owe fifty-four cents. I assume I've misheard. He brings me the receipt and the drink indeed costs fifty-four cents with tax. The three of us sit on the outdoor deck for a few more of the foamy delights and a bowl of first-rate golden onion rings. I could've had seven chocolate egg creams for the price of the one small bottle of sparking water I drink during the second round.

Could egg creams be the new 90210 trend, like a lower cal milkshake alternative that brings all the boys to the yard? If so, maybe it's creating an economy of scale and thus, the fifty cent Barney's egg cream is born. I know the ingredients aren't very precious (and they mistakenly use Hershey's syrup instead of U-Bet), but why this price when it requires more effort than pouring a three-dollar soda?

Renaissance of a Classic: Kuishimbo

It was a very sad day when I drove past Kuishimbo on Wilshire and Wilton sometime last year and saw the sign removed and the storefront shuttered. Why on earth would this little treasure ever close? I tried what's now in its place, and it's just not the same.

But the phoenix doth rise from the ashes, people. When recently cruising down 6th Street, glancing at Ham Ji Park and Ice Kiss, next door I noticed.... a Kuishimbo sign!

After a super fun morning playing around with the home espresso machines at Pasquini on Olympic near Union Street and learning from Mr. Pasquini himself (I highly recommend dropping in sometime, regardless of your intentions of making a purchase), what better way to continue what was already a great Saturday than to give the relocated Kuishimbo a test drive.

It's back and dare I say, better than ever, even if the nostalgia whore in me misses (just a little) the crumbing suspended acoustic ceiling tiles, the grime, peeling linoleum eating surfaces and brown floor tiles of the original spot. This space might still have a T-bar ceiling, but the panels are new and bright, immaculate vent hoods extend along the length of the kitchen, the counter is of-the-moment granite, and slick slate comprises the floor.

We sit at the counter, which is by far the best place to be when eating in at Kuishimbo. I'm a little annoyed by the tall glass barrier that promotes good restaurant hygiene but impairs watching the cooks at eye level and getting your food directly handed to you.

Might Kuishimbo have upgraded a little too much? Yeah, but at least it lives and prospers! It is one of my favorite restaurants EVER. This fact has not changed since oh, circa 1980. The sweet miso dressing on the shredded cabbage salad tastes exactly like it always has, they still grill the shit out of the teriyaki on what I think might be the same Wolf ranges from the old joint, and the rice tastes so good in the miso soup – my personal culinary faux pas routine I must do only at Kuishimbo (and hopefully not offend anyone).

I'm too full and giddy to try Ice Kiss, the so-cool-it's-hot spot next store featuring complicated sweet concoctions that continue to fascinate. With these three places in a row, it's a holy trinity of good stuff on the block between Kenmore and Catalina. The false alarm mourning for Kuishimbo can finally end.

Kuishimbo Japanese Char-Broil
3407 W. 6th St.

Los Angeles 90020
Locations also in Sherman Oaks and Stone Harbor, NJ. News to me!

Rice Wraparoni: the Shik Do Rak Treat

A group of friends crammed around a Korean bbq table makes George a happy birthday boy. For this reason on Sunday we went to join him on Olympic where it meets the former border of our fine Pueblo.

Shik Do Rak is special for a few reasons. The semi-open wall surfaces encourage smoking, an activity in which many patrons choose to partake. (This place and The Prince are the two restaurants where I've seen this banned pastime happening more than any other indoor establishment.) The restaurant attracts a crowd that makes people-watching endlessly engaging. Then there's the white noise of the rushing waterfall built into the back wall to help drown out the traffic and accompany the sweet sounds of the tabletop barbecue functions.

A big draw seems to the thin rice paper wrappers, or duk bo sam. This feature is even advertised on the napkins. I don't find them a very comfortable or effective vehicle in which to wrap hot meats and stuff, but they do taste good, and I love the texture.

It all keeps me guessing. The quality of the meat is lesser than other places around K-town and it's not really seasoned much. How will it taste when combined with the spicy red and mild sesame sauces? I'm interested to see how the thinly rolled pieces that resemble prosciutto cook on the round grill, and I'm confused by the unseasoned and still-frozen Pinwheel of Beef. Compared to Wonjo the panchan are limited. (I eat a lot of very yummy sesame marinated bean sprouts.) Regardless, the price is right, I keep digging into the already-cooked fantastic pork ribs and soft onions to distract me from the Hite and soju I can't drink, and it's very good times.

Shik Do Rak
2501 W. Olympic Blvd. (at Hoover)
Los Angeles 90006
213.384.4148

Whoa! Wonjo

Artesia might mostly be known for being home to Little India, but if you skip Wonjo Korean Restaurant (AKA "One Joe"), you're really missing out.

The staff gives us a very friendly greeting when we walk in with Pascal, Erika and family who thankfully brought us. It's good to go with regulars. Soon we're barely able keep up with the panchan that litter the table. The small plastic bowls just...Keep. On. Coming. My god. Favorites are the cold octopus with seaweed, broccoli, sesame bean sprouts, and best of all, two whole vegetable pancakes they serve as a bonus. No need to get the full order. These are thin and eggy, not too gluteny.

Even if the color of the sauce makes the octopus with noodles slightly resemble the contents of an operating table, we must try something ocean-centric since Wonjo's specialty is seafood. I can't eat much of it because with my wacky pregnancy palate (the one that makes wine taste bad and beer smell like drink of the gods) it's a little too hot for my current tolerance level. Next time we'll have the crab boiling pot special.

The hot stone rice pots/dol sot bi bim bap come in all sorts of varieties. We get one with beef, the other with octopus (above). The one that sits longer without being stirred (beef) is the better of the two, not because of the contents themselves, but rather the crisp rice is so damn good.

The gas hook-ups are for limited purposes, like keeping the crab pots boiling. Cooked meats are done in the kitchen and brought to the table. Their presentation of bul go gee looks like Korean fajitas, with beef sizzling on a hot platter over a bed of soft, sweet onions. Though I can't say the beef is better than what you cook yourself at Soot Bull Jeep or Cho Sun Galbee, I make good use of the mounds of awesome onions. We eat 'til we can hardly move.

The after-dinner driving tour of Artesia and Cerritos only makes me wish I had four more stomachs and the energy to stay up for a Bollywood feature at the Naz 8.

Wonjo Korean Restaurant
17303 Pioneer Blvd.
Artesia, CA 90701
562.809.0057

Andrew B.: if you're reading, sorry to make ya jealous. ;)